Intimidation
Over the last few months, I have had several men tell me that they find me intimidating, right before they attempt to pick me up.
This made me really angry, and uncomfortable, actually. I somehow don’t think they’re referring to my flawless, goddess-like beauty. It has normally come after an intellectual debate, or explaining what I’ve been researching at uni. These guys are not dumb, and were able to hold a conversation about whatever the topic was… but seem to find it surprising and, well, intimidating, that I can talk about such things, rather than, say, TV shows or shopping or, I don’t know, some condescendingly girly topic. I don’t know if it makes me more angry that these guys expect lowest common denominator conversation from women, or if they obviously receive it so much that they’re so surprised when they get someone with opinions about world events. I don’t really move in the same social circles as ‘bimbos’, and I have these types of conversations with many people.
I guess ‘intimidating’ also has connotations of ‘aggressive’, which I think is completely unfair and misguided. The only time I get aggro is when somebody says something offensive. I think that normally I’m quite friendly and sociable. Why does the fact that a woman is intelligent and has opinions make her aggressive? Maybe I am over-reading this. Feminazi killjoy strikes again!
And, quite frankly, I’d probably be more upset if people told me how frivolous they found me (and, then, proceeded to hit on me).
Or, would I prefer it if none of them hit on me? Now that’s a very timely and relevant question in my life currently…
To paraphrase dear Oscar, the only thing worse than being hit on is not being hit on?
